Adventure of the unknown.

The problem of choice.

Unchartered territory: New challenges, new experiences and fresh prespectives and possibly new outlook. Or new point of view over previous incidents.

I feel like the barren earth which could have been fertile. But which hasn’t lost its potential to be fertile. It’s barren since I haven’t nurtured it as well as I could have. It was not provided with proper nourishment. But the damage done is not irreparable. There is hope for life. The spring of wisdom can still come to the surface with a bang. The Volcano which hasn’t been allowed to vent its feelings can still erupt just because hope is intact.

I feel like the artist who couldn’t express himself. The painter whose brushes were snatched and he’s incapable to either run away or snatch those brushes back. Then suddenly out of blue after a lot of time when he has given up hope of getting back to what he considered life and he started looking for another source of meaning, those same people hand those brushes back. The person gets confused. He has got the very thing he has longed for all his life has been handed over to him without any reason. He gets tense on hearing that he is free to do whatever he wants to do. He is scared of walking the road and destroys those brushes in haste and lives the rest of his life ruing that action and trying to convince that he could’ve never ever painted. But then somewhere congratulating that he was good and he had potential to be better.

Now this land has lots of potential. He has no idea about what it can do. No idea about the effects of its expression. No idea whether the repercussions would be positive or negative. The volcano is anything the person wants badly enough to do/get.

Now he has two options. Simmer with discontent and feel constricted under pressure for a while till the volcano erupts bringing to fore the springs of unheard wisdom and treasures of unseen emotions. Something unique. From the bottom of the soul.

The other option is to find a temporary vent and keep letting go of pressure from time to time. The easy and more common option to let go of the simmering rage inside you. But being convict to the guilt and unrealized potential forever.

Do we need to search for vent? An opening. I guess yes. How do we get to know that the time is ripe for eruption? Should we continue till our patience allows us to? Should it be the time when only drastic measures can help to maintain the sanctity of land? How violating the attack should be to mutilate the sacredness to retaliate?

But the fertility of land has been long lost and I fear that the volcano will never erupt. Is it possible that there would be no explosion after we have missed the right opportunity to explode? Will those springs will remain unseen forever. Will the land die with that song still unsung in his heart?

The problem is the confusion. We cannot afford to forget the necessity of making/letting everything happen at the right time. Or can we? Is it mentioned somewhere in the mysterious shadows of world we live in? Are there omens? Are we meant to attempt to decrypt them? We write the future nevertheless. The destiny is in our hands to be made.

Am I meant to be helped? Will it hinder my growth like that of a larva which has to go through turmoil to turn into a butterfly? You help it and it will never turn into what it could have been. It would die because of your help. It would never reach its potential because it got help when it was meant to evolve into a higher being on its own.

Right now I have two plans which I can follow. Both offer tremendous opportunities and some possible drawbacks. One I continue what I was doing and learn from the routine I have been subjected to and grow. Growth will come because of the sheer intensity of sentiments I am feeling. It is nevertheless the easy thing to do.

Or I can follow the SEEMINGLY difficult path of adventure and expose myself to the vagaries of the real world. Grow from the freedom. Learn from the independent spirits.

I have no idea which road is the proverbial easy way and which one is difficult. The second one, the adventure can be considered easy since it might be construed as a way to escape the sheer intensity of feelings, as a means to escape the present reality and abandon the road and fellow pilgrims and search for meaning elsewhere. The first one might be my lack of commitment, my procrastination which holds me back from being worthy of undertaking the adventures.

Just when I was pondering over the decision, I got a sign. That if I can dare to, I should try to undertake the adventure. The mystery of unknown can bring to the surface the wisdom which was alien to me. If it’s meant otherwise, the whole providence will stop me. But I should not hold myself back. I can save the fellow travelers only if I can understand how to save myself. I must not hold myself back from reaching my full potential.